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Drink Your Carbs: The Drinker's Diet

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Recipe: How To Make Perfect Kale

5/3/2018

1 Comment

 
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Hello. My name is Steven. I used to hate kale. Now I love it.

When did it become a virtue to never change your mind? Watch any recent political coverage and the conclusion is unavoidable. We, as a country, have decided that new information should have no impact on opinions and beliefs. If you abandon a single conviction you held in seventh grade, you’re a weak-minded flip-flopper. It doesn’t matter what life experiences you’ve had between then and now. New evidence be damned. Changing your mind for any reason betrays you as indecisive and lacking in backbone.

Go ahead and accuse me of being un-American. I have flip flopped on kale.
​
I used to think that kale was far too bitter. It turns that my dislike of kale had everything to do with how it was prepared. The minute I tasted Andrea’s kale it became my favorite vegetable. Andrea and I are now in complete agreement that kale is the world’s most perfect vegetable. It’s low-calorie and high-nutrition. It’s delicious. It is the perfect compliment to any Drink Your Carbs meal.

Ingredients:
  • 2 bunches dino kale (Other types of kale will work, but dino works best)
  • 1-2 tbsp. extra virgin olive oil
  • 1 slice of bacon, finely minced (Tip: freeze uncooked bacon. Frozen bacon minces easily)
  • 2 cloves garlic, finely minced or crushed
  • ¼- ½ tsp. hot pepper flakes (Optional)
  • ½ tsp. fish sauce (Optional) (Check the label before you buy a bottle of fish sauce. Some brands contain sugar)
  • 1 tsp. salt (Use ½ tsp. if you are adding fish sauce)
  • Chicken stock or water for moisture

Method:
  • Add 1-2 tbs. of salt to a large pot of water and bring to a boil.
  • De-stem and wash the kale (detailed de-stemming instructions can be found in our Raw Kale Salad recipe)
  • Submerge the kale in the boiling water and turn off the heat immediately after submerging the kale. Leave the kale in the water for two to four minutes. Cook thicker, larger-leafed kale for four minutes and smaller-leafed kale for two. If you have a variety of big and small kale, you don’t have to boil the bunches separately. Majority rules – if it’s mostly large leafed, go for four minutes. After boiling, drain the kale into a colander and set it aside.
  • Heat the olive oil on medium in a large flat-sided skillet or sauté pan. Add the bacon and cook until the fat is mostly gone. Be careful not to cook the bacon too hot. You want flavor, but not the flavor of burned bacon. Add the garlic and sauté for another 1-2 minutes. If you are adding the optional salt, hot pepper flakes or fish sauce add it when the garlic is done.
  • Add the kale to the saucepan. It should still be wet from the blanching process. This light moisture will steam the kale. Stir well. Reduce the heat to medium-low and cover the pan. Allow the kale to cook for two minutes, then stir it and check if it is done. The best way to tell if it is done is taste it. It often takes more than one two-minute cycle. Larger, thicker kale, usually requires multiple two-minute cycles. Smaller kale might be done the first time you check it. If the kale is not done and looks dry, add a bit of chicken stock or water (two teaspoons or so is sufficient. Don’t let it get too wet). Do not add liquid if you think the kale is done. The goal is to have the kale nearly dry at the conclusion of the cooking process.
  • When the kale is done, remove the cover and remove the pan from heat. The kale can sit in the pan for up to 10 minutes (uncovered) while you finish the rest of your cooking.

Variations:
  • Chop one cup of shitake mushrooms and sauté them with the garlic until they are fairly soft. Use a bit of water, wine or chicken stock to deglaze the pan and then proceed with the recipe.
  • If you prefer softer kale, add more liquid and cook it longer. Andrea prefers to use chicken stock to add moisture and flavor at the same time. Add no more than two teaspoons of stock at a time and be sure to let it cook off completely. You want the finished kale to be nearly dry. You may need to do the final steps of cooking with the lid off in order to accomplish this.
  • For a sweeter variation, add ¼ cup raisins just before you allow the kale to simmer for the final two minutes with the lid on. Top with toasted pine nuts just before serving.
1 Comment
Roy link
4/28/2019 09:49:25 pm

Sounds delicious!

Reply



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  • Blog
  • What
    • How Diets Work
    • Why Are Americans Fat?
    • Are You Joking?
    • Travel
    • History of Drinkers Diets
  • Eat
    • Basic Drink Your Carbs >
      • Maintenance
      • Grading Your Performance
      • How To Cheat On Your Diet
      • Calories In Deep-Frying
      • What About Gluten And Dairy?
    • Austerity Mode
    • Nightmare Mode >
      • 30-Day Nightmare Mode Experiment
    • Food List >
      • Basic Drink Your Carbs Food List
      • Austerity Mode Food List
      • Nightmare Mode Food List
    • Recipes
  • Drink
    • How Much Can I Drink?
    • Artificial Sweeteners
    • Sports Drinks
    • Don't Drive Drunk
    • Cocktail Recipes
  • Sweat
    • Basic Exercise
    • Advanced Exercise
    • Insane Exercise
    • Advice From Coach Hector
  • Praise
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    • Share Your Story
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