Grading Your Performance
How strict is strict enough for Drink Your Carbs?
We grade our own compliance using the same letter system used by the meanest, toughest teacher in the world. That teacher taught at our middle school. She was a small woman with a fair complexion and sandy blonde hair. But her mild-mannered appearance fooled no one. She ruled her classroom with an iron fist. She had no first name. In her presence, she was Mrs. Morgan. Outside of her presence, everyone referred to her as “Major Morgan.”
Major Morgan cut no slack and tolerated no dissent. Everyone who knew her feared her. We would occasionally find a student who had just left Major Morgan’s class crying in the hallway. Of course, if you survived her class with a decent grade you were, from that day forward, impossible to intimidate. Every other teacher you might come across and every other class you might attend seemed easy by comparison.
The purpose of this exercise is not to inspire guilt. The goal here is to do an honest evaluation of your adherence to Drink Your Carbs.
We understand that 100 percent compliance is rare. Most of us do not prepare all of our own meals so we are often faced with choices that are less than ideal. The reason to evaluate your own performance continually is to keep non-compliance to a minimum. Regular grading allows you to make corrections before an occasional cheat becomes a permanent habit, before one bad meal becomes your new baseline.
Major Morgan issued a weekly pop quiz. At the time, we assumed she did this out of spite. As adults, we now understand that Major Morgan wanted us to regularly check our performance so that we would be able to react quickly if it began to degrade. We suggest you adopt Major Morgan’s model and grade yourself weekly.
When you grade your own compliance, feel free to channel an inner Major Morgan if you do not have a teacher of your own to draw upon.
We grade our own compliance using the same letter system used by the meanest, toughest teacher in the world. That teacher taught at our middle school. She was a small woman with a fair complexion and sandy blonde hair. But her mild-mannered appearance fooled no one. She ruled her classroom with an iron fist. She had no first name. In her presence, she was Mrs. Morgan. Outside of her presence, everyone referred to her as “Major Morgan.”
Major Morgan cut no slack and tolerated no dissent. Everyone who knew her feared her. We would occasionally find a student who had just left Major Morgan’s class crying in the hallway. Of course, if you survived her class with a decent grade you were, from that day forward, impossible to intimidate. Every other teacher you might come across and every other class you might attend seemed easy by comparison.
The purpose of this exercise is not to inspire guilt. The goal here is to do an honest evaluation of your adherence to Drink Your Carbs.
We understand that 100 percent compliance is rare. Most of us do not prepare all of our own meals so we are often faced with choices that are less than ideal. The reason to evaluate your own performance continually is to keep non-compliance to a minimum. Regular grading allows you to make corrections before an occasional cheat becomes a permanent habit, before one bad meal becomes your new baseline.
Major Morgan issued a weekly pop quiz. At the time, we assumed she did this out of spite. As adults, we now understand that Major Morgan wanted us to regularly check our performance so that we would be able to react quickly if it began to degrade. We suggest you adopt Major Morgan’s model and grade yourself weekly.
When you grade your own compliance, feel free to channel an inner Major Morgan if you do not have a teacher of your own to draw upon.
Major Morgan’s Grading Scale
90 to 100% compliance is an A.
Congratulations. Take yourself out for a drink.
80 to 90% compliance is a B. Not bad.
You are probably losing weight, but you could be losing weight faster.
Below 80% is a failing grade. (We warned you that Major Morgan was a hard ass.)
You are not on Drink Your Carbs. If you’re losing weight while adhering to the diet less than 80 percent of the time, your pre-Drink Your Carbs diet must have been truly horrific. But if you are losing weight, we recommend that you continue doing whatever it is that you are doing, even if it isn’t technically Drink Your Carbs. When you stop losing weight, try increasing your compliance. We think you’ll be happy with the results.
Remember: Major Morgan did not grade on a curve. If all of your friends are failing, it won’t boost your grade. Everyone is graded individually on his or her own performance. In this case, some children will be left behind.